Sex work is a roller-coaster and sometimes that rollercoaster goes down. Every sex worker has slow times. Your phone isn’t ringing, the rents due, you are sick of staring at the same four walls all day long, you can’t help but feel “what’s wrong with me?”
The answer is, nothing. The way of sex work means that slow periods come and go. There is no special secret to avoiding them, and it doesn’t mean suddenly you’ve turned into an ogre no one wants to book. It can be from a bunch of different things such an a downturn in the economy, school holidays, tax time, winter.
Its not you! But, regardless, how do you take care of yourself during those times? Well, self care is important and helps you stay sane.
Here are some tips and tricks by Rain Morgan:
Private sex work can be isolating and lonely. Take the time when work is quiet to keep busy. Read a book, get out and see friends, take up a hobby that keeps your mind going.
Stick to a routine. Get up each day planning to work. Get out of the house, eat a good meal, call a friend. Sitting inside staring at the wall will only frustrate you. Take a few hours or a dedicated day each week to switch off your work phone and focus on what makes you happy.
Shake up your marketing.
Take the time when work is quiet to mix up your marketing. Edit and reword your ads, post some ads on different directories, change the thumbnail photos for your ads, change the location listed on your ads. Plan some tours, work on pumping out selfies for social media.
Really take the time to focus and put back into your business. Consider trying a brothel shift if you are a private worker or perhaps offer a ‘pre-booking special’ to social media followers.
Stack your cash.
When work is good take the time to put aside at least 3-6 months of savings (if you can). Prepay some bills, pay extra on your rent, some directories you can pay 3-6 months of advertising at once. This isn’t possible for everyone, but having an emergency fund to fall back on is crucial to keeping sane during the quiet periods.
This isn’t possible for everyone, especially survival workers. But it helps to plan for the future. Quiet times will always come around, scrimping and saving helps keep you from feeling that ‘how do I pay rent this week’ panic.
Don’t compare yourself to others.
Disengage from social media, you can use a website like Buffer or the inbuilt Twitter feature on directories like Mayfair Confidential to schedule tweets in advance.
Comparing yourself to how busy xyz seems or how your friends are doing only leads to your self esteem taking a downturn. Sex work social media isn’t always realistic, its marketing geared at clients. X saying she is ‘fully booked’ may mean she’s at home on the couch watching Netflix. Focus on you and no one else.
It will get busy again.
We all fall into a bit of negative self talk when it is quiet. It’s hard to push past this. But I promise you, it will always pick up again. Sex work has ebbs and flows, and they have zero to do with you. There is no expiration date to being a sex worker.
One week you are calling your phone to make sure it still works, and the next you are walking to the bank with a stack of cash. It will get better, promise!
You are still attractive, people still dying to spend time with you, your clients love you.
You got this!